Our previous article, 30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself, was well
received by most of our readers, but several of you suggested that we
follow it up with a list of things to start doing. In one reader’s
words, “I would love to see you revisit each of these 30 principles, but
instead of presenting us with a ‘to-don’t’ list, present us with a
‘to-do’ list that we all can start working on today, together.” Some
folks, such as readers Danny Head and Satori Agape, actually took it one
step further and emailed us their own revised ‘to-do’ versions of the
list.
So I sat down last night with our original article and the
two reader’s revisions as a guide, and a couple hours later finalized a
new list of 30 things; which ended up being, I think, a perfect
complement to the original.
Here it is, a positive ‘to-do’ list for the upcoming year – 30 things to start doing for yourself:
1. Start spending time with the right people. – These are the people
you enjoy, who love and appreciate you, and who encourage you to
improve in healthy and exciting ways. They are the ones who make you
feel more alive, and not only embrace who you are now, but also embrace
and embody who you want to be, unconditionally.
2. Start
facing your problems head on. – It isn’t your problems that define you,
but how you react to them and recover from them. Problems will not
disappear unless you take action. Do what you can, when you can, and
acknowledge what you’ve done. It’s all about taking baby steps in the
right direction, inch by inch. These inches count, they add up to yards
and miles in the long run.
3. Start being honest with
yourself about everything. – Be honest about what’s right, as well as
what needs to be changed. Be honest about what you want to achieve and
who you want to become. Be honest with every aspect of your life,
always. Because you are the one person you can forever count on.
Search your soul, for the truth, so that you truly know who you are.
Once you do, you’ll have a better understanding of where you are now and
how you got here, and you’ll be better equipped to identify where you
want to go and how to get there. Read The Road Less Traveled.
4.
Start making your own happiness a priority. – Your needs matter. If
you don’t value yourself, look out for yourself, and stick up for
yourself, you’re sabotaging yourself. Remember, it IS possible to take
care of your own needs while simultaneously caring for those around you.
And once your needs are met, you will likely be far more capable of
helping those who need you most.
5. Start being yourself,
genuinely and proudly. – Trying to be anyone else is a waste of the
person you are. Be yourself. Embrace that individual inside you that
has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else. Be the person you
know yourself to be – the best version of you – on your terms. Above
all, be true to YOU, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take
yourself out of it.
6. Start noticing and living in the
present. – Right now is a miracle. Right now is the only moment
guaranteed to you. Right now is life. So stop thinking about how great
things will be in the future. Stop dwelling on what did or didn’t
happen in the past. Learn to be in the ‘here and now’ and experience
life as it’s happening. Appreciate the world for the beauty that it
holds, right now.
7. Start valuing the lessons your mistakes
teach you. – Mistakes are okay; they’re the stepping stones of progress.
If you’re not failing from time to time, you’re not trying hard enough and you’re not learning. Take
risks, stumble, fall, and then get up and try again. Appreciate that
you are pushing yourself, learning, growing and improving. Significant
achievements are almost invariably realized at the end of a long road of
failures. One of the ‘mistakes’ you fear might just be the link to
your greatest achievement yet.
8. Start being more polite to
yourself. – If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that
you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to
be your friend? The way you treat yourself sets the standard for
others. You must love who you are or no one else will.
9.
Start enjoying the things you already have. – The problem with many of
us is that we think we’ll be happy when we reach a certain level in life
– a level we see others operating at – your boss with her corner
office, that friend of a friend who owns a mansion on the beach, etc.
Unfortunately, it takes awhile before you get there, and when you get
there you’ll likely have a new destination in mind. You’ll end up
spending your whole life working toward something new without ever
stopping to enjoy the things you have now. So take a quiet moment every
morning when you first awake to appreciate where you are and what you
already have.
10. Start creating your own happiness. – If you
are waiting for someone else to make you happy, you’re missing out.
Smile because you can. Choose happiness. Be the change you want to see
in the world. Be happy with who you are now, and let your positivity
inspire your journey into tomorrow. Happiness is often found when and
where you decide to seek it. If you look for happiness within the
opportunities you have, you will eventually find it. But if you
constantly look for something else, unfortunately, you’ll find that too.
Read Stumbling on Happiness.
11. Start giving your ideas
and dreams a chance. – In life, it’s rarely about getting a chance; it’s
about taking a chance. You’ll never be 100% sure it will work, but you
can always be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work. Most of the time you
just have to go for it! And no matter how it turns out, it always ends
up just the way it should be. Either you succeed or you learn
something. Win-Win.
12. Start believing that you’re ready for
the next step. – You are ready! Think about it. You have everything
you need right now to take the next small, realistic step forward. So
embrace the opportunities that come your way, and accept the challenges –
they’re gifts that will help you to grow.
13. Start entering
new relationships for the right reasons. – Enter new relationships with
dependable, honest people who reflect the person you are and the person
you want to be. Choose friends you are proud to know, people you
admire, who show you love and respect – people who reciprocate your
kindness and commitment. And pay attention to what people do, because a
person’s actions are much more important than their words or how others
represent them.
14. Start giving new people you meet a
chance. – It sounds harsh, but you cannot keep every friend you’ve ever
made. People and priorities change. As some relationships fade others
will grow. Appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you
naturally let go of old ones that no longer work. Trust your judgment.
Embrace new relationships, knowing that you are entering into
unfamiliar territory. Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and
be ready to meet someone that might just change your life forever.
15.
Start competing against an earlier version of yourself. – Be
inspired by others, appreciate others, learn from others, but know that
competing against them is a waste of time. You are in competition with
one person and one person only – yourself. You are competing to be the
best you 16. Start cheering for other people’s victories. – Start noticing
what you like about others and tell them. Having an appreciation for
how amazing the people around you are leads to good places – productive,
fulfilling, peaceful places. So be happy for those who are making
progress. Cheer for their victories. Be thankful for their blessings,
openly. What goes around comes around, and sooner or later the people
you’re cheering for will start cheering for you.
17. Start
looking for the silver lining in tough situations. – When things are
hard, and you feel down, take a few deep breaths and look for the silver
lining – the small glimmers of hope. Remind yourself that you can and
will grow stronger from these hard times. And remain conscious of your
blessings and victories – all the things in your life that are right.
Focus on what you have, not on what you haven’t.
18. Start
forgiving yourself and others. – We’ve all been hurt by our own
decisions and by others. And while the pain of these experiences is
normal, sometimes it lingers for too long. We relive the pain over and
over and have a hard time letting go. Forgiveness is the remedy. It
doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It
means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing
to learn from the incident and move on with your life.
19.
Start helping those around you. – Care about people. Guide them if you
know a better way. The more you help others, the more they will want to
help you. Love and kindness begets love and kindness. And so on and
so forth.
20. Start listening to your own inner voice. – If it
helps, discuss your ideas with those closest to you, but give yourself
enough room to follow your own intuition. Be true to yourself. Say
what you need to say. Do what you know in your heart is right.
21.
Start being attentive to your stress level and take short breaks. –
Slow down. Breathe. Give yourself permission to pause, regroup and
move forward with clarity and purpose. When you’re at your busiest, a
brief recess can rejuvenate your mind and increase your productivity.
These short breaks will help you regain your sanity and reflect on your
recent actions so you can be sure they’re in line with your goals.
22.
Start noticing the beauty of small moments. – Instead of waiting for
the big things to happen – marriage, kids, big promotion, winning the
lottery – find happiness in the small things that happen every day.
Little things like having a quiet cup of coffee in the early morning, or
the delicious taste and smell of a homemade meal, or the pleasure of
sharing something you enjoy with someone else, or holding hands with
your partner. Noticing these small pleasures on a daily basis makes a
big difference in the quality of your life.
23. Start
accepting things when they are less than perfect. – Remember, ‘perfect’
is the enemy of ‘good.’ One of the biggest challenges for people who
want to improve themselves and improve the world is learning to accept
things as they are. Sometimes it’s better to accept and appreciate the
world as it is, and people as they are, rather than to trying to make
everything and everyone conform to an impossible ideal. No, you
shouldn’t accept a life of mediocrity, but learn to love and value
things when they are less than perfect.
24. Start working
toward your goals every single day. – Remember, the journey of a
thousand miles begins with one step. Whatever it is you dream about, start taking small, logical steps every day to make it
happen. Get out there and DO something! The harder you work the
luckier you will become. While many of us decide at some point during
the course of our lives that we want to answer our calling, only an
astute few of us actually work on it. By ‘working on it,’ I mean
consistently devoting oneself to the end result. Read The 7 Habits of
Highly Effective People.
25. Start being more open about how
you feel. – If you’re hurting, give yourself the necessary space and
time to hurt, but be open about it. Talk to those closest to you. Tell
them the truth about how you feel. Let them listen. The simple act of
getting things off your chest and into the open is your first step
toward feeling good again.
26. Start taking full
accountability for your own life. – Own your choices and mistakes, and
be willing to take the necessary steps to improve upon them. Either you
take accountability for your life or someone else will. And when they
do, you’ll become a slave to their ideas and dreams instead of a pioneer
of your own. You are the only one who can directly control the outcome
of your life. And no, it won’t always be easy. Every person has a
stack of obstacles in front of them. But you must take accountability
for your situation and overcome these obstacles. Choosing not to is
choosing a lifetime of mere existence.
27. Start actively
nurturing your most important relationships. – Bring real, honest joy
into your life and the lives of those you love by simply telling them
how much they mean to you on a regular basis. You can’t be everything
to everyone, but you can be everything to a few people. Decide who
these people are in your life and treat them like royalty. Remember,
you don’t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you
can be certain of.
28. Start concentrating on the things you
can control. – You can’t change everything, but you can always change
something. Wasting your time, talent and emotional energy on things
that are beyond your control is a recipe for frustration, misery and
stagnation. Invest your energy in the things you can control, and act
on them now.
29. Start focusing on the possibility of positive
outcomes. – The mind must believe it CAN do something before it is
capable of actually doing it. The way to overcome negative thoughts and
destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are
stronger and more powerful. Listen to your self-talk and replace
negative thoughts with positive ones. Regardless of how a situation
seems, focus on what you DO WANT to happen, and then take the next
positive step forward. No, you can’t control everything that happens to
you, but you can control how you react to things. Everyone’s life has
positive and negative aspects – whether or not you’re happy and
successful in the long run depends greatly on which aspects you focus
on. Read The How of Happiness.
30. Start noticing how wealthy
you are right now. – Henry David Thoreau once said, “Wealth is the
ability to fully experience life.” Even when times are tough, it’s
always important to keep things in perspective. You didn’t go to sleep
hungry last night. You didn’t go to sleep outside. You had a choice of
what clothes to wear this morning. You hardly broke a sweat today.
You didn’t spend a minute in fear. You have access to clean drinking
water. You have access to medical care. You have access to the
Internet. You can read. Some might say you are incredibly wealthy, so
remember to be grateful for all the things you do have
Source: http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/12/18/30-things-to-start-doing-for-yourself/?utm_content=
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