It is just for the men though as I know
nothing about women. So women, please,
just be on your way because this isn’t for
you unless you’d like to leave a copy for
your husband.
I’m going to share secrets with you that
will change your life. But, when I say
“secrets”, you’ll say, “that crap isn’t
secret at all. My wife tells me that all
the time.”
Which brings us to number one:
1. Listen:
That’s right; when she speaks, she
usually has something to tell you. You
might learn something about the single
most important person in your life.
Crazy, I know. Ask yourself right now:
what’s her favorite color, her shoe size,
what does she like least about her body,
what household chore does she despise,
paper or plastic? You should know this
stuff. She tells you all the time. You just
aren’t listening.
When she starts talking about tennis
bracelets in November, she’s trying to
help you with your Christmas shopping,
Einstein.
If you actually start listening to her, she
will be so dumbfounded that she’ll say
“yes” to s*x just to see if you’re still
listening.
2. Don’t ask don’t tell:
Everybody likes to be surprised and
pampered. What if just once in a while,
you, without your wife’s consent or
assistance, arranged for a babysitter,
picked her up at work and took her out
to dinner?
Now she’s stunned. Her defenses are
down. It’s likely you’re getting laid.
3. If you use it, put it up. If you drop it,
pick it up. If you spill it, clean it up:
She’s not your Momma. And, hopefully,
your Momma taught you better.
Clean up after yourself for God’s sake.
Trust me; there is little your wife finds
less sexy than picking your dirty tidy
whiteys up off the bathroom floor. I can
say with great confidence that this is
almost universally true for all women.
Your wife is now confused. She’ll wander
all about the house wondering what
you’ve done with all the messes. When
she looks in the bedroom; now you’ve got
her.
4. Bite your tongue (or, “No, those pants
do not make you look fat”):
Nobody likes constant criticism,
especially if it’s from the person they’d
most like to please (that’s probably you).
If you continually browbeat your wife,
she feels less sexy and thinks you’re less
sexy as well. You wanna look more like
George Clooney? Quit your bitching!!
Oh, and the answer to the do these
pants make me look fat question: “of
course not darlin’. But, still, they’re not
my favorite. You really look hot in that
red pair.”
5. WWAAD…what would Alan Alda do?:
Think of all the heroes in all the movies
you’ve ever seen. Yeah, the movies where
the guy wins the girl. Do you think the
hero’s gonna sit on his a*s watching the
WWF while the girl of his dreams has to
cook his dinner while sweeping the floor
with a screaming baby balanced on her
hip? No, he’s not. He’s gonna get up and
gently take the broom and mini-you
from his girl and tell her, “Honey, it’s
probably been a long day for you, go put
your feet up and let me finish dinner.
Oh, and by the way, here’s the remote.”
That’s what Alan Alda would do.
You wife is now so grateful for this
selfless and heroic act, that like the
proverbial damsel in distress, now
rescued, she has no choice but to submit
to your s*xual advances.
Would it really kill ya’ to do a load of
laundry once in a while?
6. Treat her like a thoroughbred; she’ll
never be a nag:
This is the same hottie that had you
twisted in knots lo those many years
ago. She still needs your affirmation.
She still needs to feel attractive. She
still needs to feel adored. Her hair, her
eyes, her smile, her legs, her touch, her
mind, her spirit, her perfume, the list of
things you can compliment her on is
limitless. She does not want to have s*x
with anyone that doesn’t desire her. She
has some pride, after all. If you don’t
make her feel desired, there are plenty
of other guys out there who will…me for
example.
If you tell her everyday how sexy she is
she’ll begin to feel sexy, and you know
what sexy girls like to do.
7. The most secret weapon of all: No
woman can resist this, so use it wisely. I
do not give this piece of advice lightly
for it is powerful stuff.
Every Monday or Tuesday (it’s good to
change up the day once in a while just so
she doesn’t get complacent) I take a
small amount of time out of my lunch
hour and drive over to the nearest
grocery store. They have a floral
boutique there. I buy a single long stem
rose. I take the rose to my wife’s place
of employment and present it to her. Oh,
and don’t forget the little card that
goes with the rose. The card may be even
more important than the flower.
The result of this action is two-fold.
One; not only is the wife thrilled that
you are thinking about her but that you
actually made an effort to show your
affection.
Secondly, but of no little consequence,
after a few weeks of this behavior the
other women at your wife’s place of
employment will start to become envious
of her. That’s right now your wife’s co-
workers think she’s made a better choice
of life partners than they did. Some of
the women where she works might even
snub her. Your wife will secretly delight
in this. And, suddenly you are a source
of pride to her. Suddenly, she must be
smart and sexy and desirable to have
such an attentive and devoted man.
And, every time a woman walks into her
office and makes a snide comment about
your wife always getting roses, she’s on
her way home to rock your world.
Don’t tell anybody I told you.
http://open.salon.com/blog/john_
walker/2010/02/02/7_ways_to_trick_
your_wife_into_having_sex_every_day
nothing about women. So women, please,
just be on your way because this isn’t for
you unless you’d like to leave a copy for
your husband.
I’m going to share secrets with you that
will change your life. But, when I say
“secrets”, you’ll say, “that crap isn’t
secret at all. My wife tells me that all
the time.”
Which brings us to number one:
1. Listen:
That’s right; when she speaks, she
usually has something to tell you. You
might learn something about the single
most important person in your life.
Crazy, I know. Ask yourself right now:
what’s her favorite color, her shoe size,
what does she like least about her body,
what household chore does she despise,
paper or plastic? You should know this
stuff. She tells you all the time. You just
aren’t listening.
When she starts talking about tennis
bracelets in November, she’s trying to
help you with your Christmas shopping,
Einstein.
If you actually start listening to her, she
will be so dumbfounded that she’ll say
“yes” to s*x just to see if you’re still
listening.
2. Don’t ask don’t tell:
Everybody likes to be surprised and
pampered. What if just once in a while,
you, without your wife’s consent or
assistance, arranged for a babysitter,
picked her up at work and took her out
to dinner?
Now she’s stunned. Her defenses are
down. It’s likely you’re getting laid.
3. If you use it, put it up. If you drop it,
pick it up. If you spill it, clean it up:
She’s not your Momma. And, hopefully,
your Momma taught you better.
Clean up after yourself for God’s sake.
Trust me; there is little your wife finds
less sexy than picking your dirty tidy
whiteys up off the bathroom floor. I can
say with great confidence that this is
almost universally true for all women.
Your wife is now confused. She’ll wander
all about the house wondering what
you’ve done with all the messes. When
she looks in the bedroom; now you’ve got
her.
4. Bite your tongue (or, “No, those pants
do not make you look fat”):
Nobody likes constant criticism,
especially if it’s from the person they’d
most like to please (that’s probably you).
If you continually browbeat your wife,
she feels less sexy and thinks you’re less
sexy as well. You wanna look more like
George Clooney? Quit your bitching!!
Oh, and the answer to the do these
pants make me look fat question: “of
course not darlin’. But, still, they’re not
my favorite. You really look hot in that
red pair.”
5. WWAAD…what would Alan Alda do?:
Think of all the heroes in all the movies
you’ve ever seen. Yeah, the movies where
the guy wins the girl. Do you think the
hero’s gonna sit on his a*s watching the
WWF while the girl of his dreams has to
cook his dinner while sweeping the floor
with a screaming baby balanced on her
hip? No, he’s not. He’s gonna get up and
gently take the broom and mini-you
from his girl and tell her, “Honey, it’s
probably been a long day for you, go put
your feet up and let me finish dinner.
Oh, and by the way, here’s the remote.”
That’s what Alan Alda would do.
You wife is now so grateful for this
selfless and heroic act, that like the
proverbial damsel in distress, now
rescued, she has no choice but to submit
to your s*xual advances.
Would it really kill ya’ to do a load of
laundry once in a while?
6. Treat her like a thoroughbred; she’ll
never be a nag:
This is the same hottie that had you
twisted in knots lo those many years
ago. She still needs your affirmation.
She still needs to feel attractive. She
still needs to feel adored. Her hair, her
eyes, her smile, her legs, her touch, her
mind, her spirit, her perfume, the list of
things you can compliment her on is
limitless. She does not want to have s*x
with anyone that doesn’t desire her. She
has some pride, after all. If you don’t
make her feel desired, there are plenty
of other guys out there who will…me for
example.
If you tell her everyday how sexy she is
she’ll begin to feel sexy, and you know
what sexy girls like to do.
7. The most secret weapon of all: No
woman can resist this, so use it wisely. I
do not give this piece of advice lightly
for it is powerful stuff.
Every Monday or Tuesday (it’s good to
change up the day once in a while just so
she doesn’t get complacent) I take a
small amount of time out of my lunch
hour and drive over to the nearest
grocery store. They have a floral
boutique there. I buy a single long stem
rose. I take the rose to my wife’s place
of employment and present it to her. Oh,
and don’t forget the little card that
goes with the rose. The card may be even
more important than the flower.
The result of this action is two-fold.
One; not only is the wife thrilled that
you are thinking about her but that you
actually made an effort to show your
affection.
Secondly, but of no little consequence,
after a few weeks of this behavior the
other women at your wife’s place of
employment will start to become envious
of her. That’s right now your wife’s co-
workers think she’s made a better choice
of life partners than they did. Some of
the women where she works might even
snub her. Your wife will secretly delight
in this. And, suddenly you are a source
of pride to her. Suddenly, she must be
smart and sexy and desirable to have
such an attentive and devoted man.
And, every time a woman walks into her
office and makes a snide comment about
your wife always getting roses, she’s on
her way home to rock your world.
Don’t tell anybody I told you.
http://open.salon.com/blog/john_
walker/2010/02/02/7_ways_to_trick_
your_wife_into_having_sex_every_day
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