For a boss, letting an
employee go can be a stressful and even painful experience. Possibly
that’s why making the firing process as easy as possible—for the person
doing the firing—is something of a cottage industry. That’s too bad, because while terminating an employee is definitely hard for you, getting fired is way harder for the employee. So
forget about your feelings. Whenever you have to fire an employee,
clearly you must protect your business from any legal ramifications.
After that, your only goal is to treat the employee as compassionately
and respectfully as possible. Your feelings are irrelevant. Which is why you should never say any of the following:
1. “This is really hard for me.”
Who
cares if it’s hard for you? The employee certainly doesn’t. Any time
you talk about how difficult the situation is for you the employee
thinks, “Oh yeah? What about me? How hard do you think this is on me?”
If you feel bad—and you will—talk through your feelings later with
someone else.
And also never lead off by saying, “I’m not sure how to say this…” You’re sure what to say. You’re just uncomfortable saying it.
Never even hint that the employee should somehow feel your pain; that’s just selfish.
2. “We’ve decided we need to make a change.”
You’re
not an NFL team firing an unsuccessful coach. And you’re not holding a
press conference either. So skip the platitudes. If you’ve done your job
right the employee already knows why he’s being fired.
State the reason for your action as clearly and concisely as possible. Or just say, “John, I have to let you go.”
3. “We’ll work out some of the details later.”
For
the employee, getting fired is both the end and the start of another
process: Collecting personal items, returning company property, learning
about benefits status, etc.
It’s your job to know how all that
works—ahead of time. Getting fired is bad enough; sitting in limbo while
you figure out the next steps is humiliating for an employee who wants
nothing more than to leave. Never make an employee wait to meet with
others who are part of the process. Once you let them go, the employee
is on their time, not yours.
4. “Compared to Joe, you just aren’t cutting it.”
Never
compare the fired employee to someone else as justification. Employees
should be fired because they fail to meet standards, targets, or
behavioral expectations.
Plus, drawing comparisons between
employees makes it possible for what should be an objective decision to
veer into the “personality zone.” That’s a conversational black hole you
will struggle to escape.
5. “I disagree, and here’s why…”
Most
employees sit quietly, but a few will want to argue. Never let yourself
be dragged into a back-and-forth discussion. Just say, “Mark, we can
talk about this as long as you like, but you should understand that
nothing we discuss will change the decision.” Arguments almost always
make the employee feel worse.
Be professional, be empathetic, and stick to the facts. Don’t feel the need to respond if an employee starts to vent.
Just listen—that’s the least you can do. And the most you can do.
to be continued.... |
6. “You’ve been a solid employee but we simply have to cut staffing.”
If you truly are downsizing, leave performance out and just say so.
But
if you’re not actually downsizing, and you’re hiding behind that excuse
so the conversation is easier for you, then you do the employee a
disservice—and you open your business up to potential problems,
especially if you later hire someone to fill the open slot.
Never play games to try to protect the employee’s feelings—or, worse, to protect your own. Just be straightforward.
7. “We both know you aren’t happy here, so down the road you’ll be glad this happened.”
Whether
or not the employee will someday be glad you let them go is not for you
to judge. Employees can’t find a silver lining in the fired cloud, at
least not at first. Let them find their own glimmers of possibility.
8. “I need to walk you to the door.”
I worked for a company where the policy was to immediately escort terminated employees out of the building.
An
employee you fire is not a criminal. Don’t put them through a walk of
shame. Just set simple parameters. Say, “John, go ahead and gather up
your personal belongings and I’ll meet you back here in 10 minutes.”
If John doesn’t come back, go get him. He won’t argue.
9. “We have decided to let you go.”
The word “we” is appropriate in almost every setting, but not this one.
Say, “I.” At this moment, you are the company (even if, in fact, you’re just an employee.) Take responsibility.
10. “If there is anything I can do for you, just let me know.”
Like
what? Write a glowing letter of recommendation? Call your connections
and put in a good word for him? (Of course, if you are laying off good
employees due to lack of work you should do anything you can to help
them land on their feet.)
Absolutely say, “If you have any
questions about benefits, final paychecks, or other details, call me.
I’ll make sure you get the answers you need.” But never offer to do
things you can’t do. You might feel a little better after trying to seem
generous, but the employee won’t.
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